"All it takes is one little flash of tit to give you a mike-on? Wow, I envy you men. Really, no sarcasm." I was only 19 at the time, been in the truth all of 18 months and not had a shag in all that time! However, I think the topic is so important, I have just moved it on to a thread of its own. See Were you ever "rewarded" for faithful service? Jonty :)
Jonty Parkin
JoinedPosts by Jonty Parkin
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27
Prats with microphones
by Jonty Parkin inin your congregation, did you ever have macho-wannabes on the microphones, strutting up and down the aisles handling the mikes as though they were aka assault rifles?.
we had a few tossers like this.
in fact, i might even have been one of them.... jonty
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Were you ever "rewarded" for your faithful service?
by Jonty Parkin in"rewards" for faithful service sometimes used to come in the most unlikely manner.
to illustrate; the "privillege" of being a young microphone handler occasionally yielded its wholesome dividends of an unexpected nature.
for example, when i was once on microphone duty as a young aspirant ministerial slave, i was rewarded with an edifying flash of theocratic tit when a sister leant forward to give her comment.
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Jonty Parkin
"Rewards" for faithful service sometimes used to come in the most unlikely manner. To illustrate; the "privillege" of being a young microphone handler occasionally yielded its wholesome dividends of an unexpected nature. For example, when I was once on microphone duty as a young aspirant ministerial slave, I was rewarded with an edifying flash of theocratic tit when a sister leant forward to give her comment.
When I got home later, I gave thanks and praised the loving Earthly Organisation by handling my own mike in uplifting appreciation! Has anybody else been similarly rewarded for faithful service to the wonderful Earthly Organisation?
Jonty
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Prats with microphones
by Jonty Parkin inin your congregation, did you ever have macho-wannabes on the microphones, strutting up and down the aisles handling the mikes as though they were aka assault rifles?.
we had a few tossers like this.
in fact, i might even have been one of them.... jonty
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Jonty Parkin
Of course, the "privillege" of being a young microphone handler occasionally yielded its wholesome dividends of an unexpected nature. For example, when I was a microphone duty once, I was rewarded with an edifying flash of theocratic tit when a sister leant forward to give her comment.
When I got home later, I gave thanks and praised the loving Organisation by handling my own mike in uplifting appreciation!
Jonty
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When Smart People Do Really Dumb Things
by Euphemism inharvard professor weldong xu has confessed to raising $600,000 on the false pretense that the money would fund sars research in china.
his reason?
he wanted the money to invest in a nigerian e-mail scam.. obviously, scientific knowledge does not necessarily translate into common sense...
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Jonty Parkin
LOL - that reminds me that, just before I came to China, I was the recipient of a Nigerian e-mail scam. Fortunately, I knew about this kind of con, and so I had days of fun playing along with it. I went so far as to say I had cash available for them, and to ask them for their bank details!
Jonty
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Asking for money on the doors.
by Jonty Parkin inwhile i was still a faithful slave of the organisation in the uk, a change came into effect that must have broken their corperate righteous heart!.
because of some law to do with registered charities and solicited contributions, the wts in britain were forced to make all of their publications (including videos and cassettes) available at no cost.
cool!
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Jonty Parkin
While I was still a faithful slave of The Organisation in the UK, a change came into effect that must have broken their corperate righteous heart!
Because of some law to do with registered charities and solicited contributions, the WTS in Britain were forced to make all of their publications (including videos and cassettes) available at no cost. Cool! This meant that I no longer had to shell out good money on regurgitated tripe that I could not
sell onplace, and that I could now swell out my theocratic library with all those nice "luxury items", such as the videos and cassettes, not to mention an extra copy of the Insight volumes!Of course, reminders from The Society abounded that this did not mean that the literature was now "free". We were warmly invited to increase our contributions commensurate with the literature we were now receiving "at no cost". Furthermore, any, ahem, "unsolicited donations" obtained for the literature in the field, should be put directly into the contribution box, not into our pockets.
I always hated asking for money on the doors. It just didn't seem right. I used to just give the bloody stuff away anyway. But the funny thing was, even though I was no longer duty bound to solicit the obligatory 30 pence "contribution", I still couldn't give the bloody stuff away!
What about other countries today? Did they still have to pay for this shite?
Jonty
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Did you ever experience "Joy"?
by Pork Chop inone thing that always struck me was the rather dour nature of the organization.
i know people laugh, and at seem to have a good time, at least occasionally.
however, one thing i just haven't seen is a real outpouring of joy, like david dancing like a crazy man or some of the other occassions in the scriptures when it seems like people were almost overcome with joy.. anyone here ever feel real joy as a witness?
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Jonty Parkin
Once when I was a microphone handler, I got an unexpected flash of tit when a sister leant forward to give her comment.
That was the most profound joy I ever experienced in connection with a meeting. I even praised The Organisation by means of a wholsome theocratic wank over it later that evening ;)
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Smoking
by Elmer J. Fudd injust wondering, has anyone here been cut with the wts's axe over smoking?
that's a no no, including smoking too, as far as the last "new light" i read.
all my dub sisters could pass as livestock.
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Jonty Parkin
"All my dub sisters could pass as livestock. I assume they buy their clothes at a tent or awning store and buy their shoes at a blacksmith shop."
LOL! Check this one out Elmer (and it's a true experience), one of the sisters in my book study group was so collosal that she literally could not get clothes which fit her properly. She was so fat that she could not keep her legs together when she sat down. I used to dread her sitting opposite me in the book study - it was like staring into the black pits of hell!
Anyway, one day we are out on the ministry, and this walrus sister pukes her guts up all over the householder's step! Amazingly the householder invited her inside to make sure she was ok - and guess what? She asked - not for a drink of water - but for a plate of sandwiches! I sat there, and watched her stuff 10 jumbo size cheese rolls into her flabby jowells!
Jonty
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Mental masterbaition is it bad or good?
by frankiespeakin in.
first off let me thanks for your contributions in advance.. i read this term in post that gave it a negative slant.. masterbaition is good and whole some,,why would some one use it as negative,,unless they veiwed it a negative??
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Jonty Parkin
Masturbation is for wankers who couldnt give a toss.
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Is Watchman guilty of the same "sin"?
by Schizm inas many of you likely know, the owner of the e-watchman website constantly charges the wts with having committed spiritual fornication with the united nations organization (the so-called ngo affair).
i would like to ask you all a question in order to find out your opinion as to whether or not watchman has done a near equivalent thing that he charges the wts with having done.
most of you were probably aware that watchman once advertised the e-watchman site on this site here (jw.com).
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Jonty Parkin
"It's nice to see someone enter this thread that has half a mind to think with."
Does this mean that comments from those of us with full minds are unwelcome?
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Silly-Putty Paragraphs With Patronisingly Unchallenging Questions!
by Jonty Parkin in.
having long since parted company with my "theocratic library", i am no longer in a position to find an example of the typically simplistic milky pap tricklings which passes for "spiritual food" in the org.. you know the kind of thing - a mind-numbingly silly putty paragraph with a patronising printed question (the answer to which is embarrasingly obvious), seldom requring more than one sentance and frequently more than one word to answer it.. can anybody give me some examples (with references) for a project i'm doing?.
jonty
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Jonty Parkin
Yes, that's the kind of thing. thanks Simon.
If anyone has any more examples (real or imagined), I'd be interested and amused to see them.
Jonty